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Masturbation and children
My 6-year old masturbates quite often, and the way she does it is that she rubs herself against a door, holding on to the doorknobs on both sides. At times it gets a bit obsessive - is that a sign of some kind of anxiety she is experiencing? Or is this normal? I assume that the way she does it is because she has not thought about an easier, more comfortable way to do it - however, at times she says her privates are hurting. I feel extremely uncomfortable about giving her advise on how to masturbate, but it does worry me that she can hurt herself by doing it this way. What should I do? Should I take her somewhere to see a therapist or something? Psychologist's answer You should pay attention to child’s behavior. Make sure if it is about masturbation or it’s only a play? Have you checked the possibility of an infection (eg. urinary or genital tract infection) which could cause tingling or pain that make her rub herself against a door? However, masturbation is a normal form of sexual expression in infancy. Young children very early start to touch their genital area (usually when changing diapers and bathing), because it creates a sense of satisfaction and meet the children’s curiosity. It is possible that this accidentally touching crosses into a systematic masturbation in the age of sixth year. This could be also a consequence of being upset. But if your girl is too much preoccupied doing it and repeats it often making herself excluded from other activities, I advise you to consult a therapist. The development of sexual behavior is a part of the overall behavior development in children. At the age of six a child should be aware that masturbation is something which is done while being alone, something intimate. Children at this age are aware of social restrictions on sexual expression. It was not quite clear from your question if your child is doing it in your presence or you accidentally come across and see it. It is very important how you behave yourself when you find her doing it. Be very careful not to forbid her to masturbate or to insult her, because it leads to a feeling of guilt or shame. You should tell her gently that the touching of genitals is a pleasant but a private thing, which is done while being alone and not in front of other people. And of course, to be careful not to hurt herself. |